mikeinbama (mikeinbama) wrote,

The Boyfriend Evaluation: Getting to Know Him - Part One

Gay Relationships: The Boyfriend Evaluation: Getting to Know Him - Part One So you made it through the first date with this new guy and he’s intrigued you. You find him attractive, enjoyable to be around, and with the little bit of information you’ve been able to obtain at your first contact, he seems to meet some of your personal requirements and needs for a potential boyfriend thus far. So now what?

Now you’re about to embark upon the fine art of dating and courtship. Together, the two of you will begin the process of getting to know each other better through going out on dates for fun and recreation and learning about one another in a variety of different contexts and situations.

Through this relationship-building process, you’ll slowly begin forming an emotional bond while gauging if the other is compatible with your visions for a life partner. Gaining this wisdom is only possible with experience and exposure to each other as you learn about each other’s preferences, personalities, needs, goals, dreams, etc.

This article will offer a checklist of qualities and characteristics to be on the lookout for as you’re forming your impressions about your new dating partner.

This can help guide you in making sound decisions about your goodness-of-fit with him, as well as to guard against any “red flags” that you may stumble upon along the way so you don’t get embroiled into an unhealthy relationship.

First Things First

While this article is about examining traits in the guy you’re seeing to help you make good relationship choices, never forget that your dating success rests largely on yourself. This means that you’ve done the work necessary to have a stable, balanced lifestyle, have a strong sense of self-esteem and confidence, have put closure to unfinished business from the past, and have a clear vision of who you are, what you want, and what you stand for (both as an individual and for a life partner and relationship). This becomes your foundation for leading a fulfilling life and having the knowledge of your negotiable and non-negotiable needs for a lifelong lover that you’ll need as you date.

Secondly, keep those pants on and hormones in check! Unless you want to define your budding relationship solely by sex, jumping into bed too quickly can confuse and blur your assessment process. Sex does change things and you don’t want to sabotage a potentially good thing by being sexual too early before a foundation of trust, rapport, and security has been established between the two of you. So, down boy! It will be that much hotter when the time is right!

[ CONTINUED TOMORROW - The Boyfriend Evaluation - questions you can ask yourself as you get acquainted with your boyfriend prospects as you date them. ]

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